WELCOME DAISY HARRIS!!!
Birkenstock-wearing glamour girl and mother of two by immaculate conception, Daisy Harris still isn’t sure if she writes erotica. Her paranormal romances start out innocently enough. However, her characters behave like complete sluts. Much to Miss Harris’s dismay, the sex tends to get completely out of hand.
If you like science-y subplots, fantastical creatures, and red-hot chemistry, you’ll love Daisy Harris.
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LOL Sexy (by Daisy Harris)
I like to write funny, and I like to write about sex. You’d think the two wouldn’t go together—this smexin’ business is, after all, quite a serious matter. However, in my mind there’s nothing hotter than a love scene with a little comic relief. Like a virgin who slurps while giving a blow-job, or a guy who takes his pants down but forgets to shuck his shoes. Actually, I love writing virgins, and not because I have some sort of value placed on “purity,” but because inexperienced folks can be really hilarious.
It’s not just virgins that are funny, though. Sometimes the sex act itself is too amusing to leave alone. I still regret cutting this one scene from my first novella, Mere Temptation. In it, a succubus was giving a man head, and some of his…um…”seed” we shall call it…shoots up her nose.
I cut this tidbit, scared of not being sexy enough. But here’s the thing— I’m constantly reading erotic romances in which heroes blissfully ejaculate down their partners’ throats in a manner that is medically and physically impossible. Okay, maybe it’s “possible,” but for, like, gay men who practice constantly or porn stars who’ve worked on it by swallowing yogurt with a cucumber lodged in their mouths.
Twenty-two year old brides in regency England probably didn’t have this skill. Nor gay men who only fifteen pages ago realized they were gay. Though maybe I shouldn’t speak for gay men as I am not one. Perhaps gay men are born with both a keen fashion sense and a lack of epiglottis.
So yeah, sex can be ridiculous, and romance-novel sex doubly so. But I love romance novels, even with all their impossible and improbable sexual tropes.
It was with a love of the impossible in mind that I wrote my newest release, STUDENSTEIN! (Yes, this title must always be written in all-caps and with an exclamation point at the end.)
In STUDENSTEIN! I created the perfect lover. Pshah, all you other romance novel heroes! None of you can hold a candle to my boy Royce Harden! Royce comes equipped with leather pants; he speaks French, Italian, Klingon and Elvish; his tongue (and other body parts) vibrate! I forgot to build him with epiglottis-inactivating pre-cum, but maybe I’ll out that in the next Love-Bot model I build.
**Wrings hand together maniacally**
Yes, Royce is everything a romance novel hero should be, except that he’s not at all what my heroine wants. And seeing him turned down by the one woman he desires above all others? That was the funniest part of all.
Here’s an excerpt of STUDENSTEIN!
“I’m sure you’re everything your makers built you to be.”
Royce wondered why her compliment seemed backhanded.
“But boy…” She lifted her hand from the bed. Royce thought she might touch him—lay her slender brown fingers on his cheek, or pat his arm at least. Instead, she lowered her fist back to the bedspread. “You are more than that.”
He snickered, trying to throw off some of those sickly feelings invading his thoughts. Fear, self-doubt—those were things he only remembered from his very first days. He never planned to revisit that state again. “What they built was pretty damn awesome.” Royce rolled onto his back, breaking their connection.
“Yeah…” Shani did pat his arm then, and squeezed it right over his biceps. Royce smiled to think she’d been appreciating his muscles. Then he realized how fucking superficial that made him sound.
Whatever “but” she’d been planning, Shani left unsaid. “Hey, can you sleep? ’Cuz I’d like to.” She grabbed a couple of thin blankets from a shelf overhead.
“Yeah.” Royce tucked a hand between his legs. The numbness still felt odd—the sensation thick like Novocain. But the darting nerve pain was gone for the time being. “For a while, at least.”
Shani reached up and flicked off the light. Once it was dark, and they both lay cocooned in their own wrap, she spoke. “If… I mean, when you’re in pain like that again…” She let out a breath that ruffled his hair. In the dark, he saw the outline of her wild hair and her curvy body. “Well, it’s not like I minded. You can ask me…if you like.
He didn’t answer, fearing relief might shake his voice if he said thank you.
Want more? Pick up your copy of Studenstein today! And remember to leave a comment for a chance to win a $25 gift certificate to Barnes and Noble.
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Studenstein (Book two in the Love-Bots series)
A man built for sex… A woman who wants more…
Freedom fighter Shani Brown is determined to drag the ungrateful Royce back to her team in Seattle. Despite his denial of mistreatment, she wants to give him a chance at a better life. Due to her horrific past as an unlicensed love-bot, Shani never plans to have sex again. But Royce’s makers punish him remotely with crippling pain. His only escape is to orgasm. Never one to turn her back on a job, Shani soon finds herself servicing him—and soon after, caring for him.
Love-bot Royce Harden wasn’t looking to be rescued, especially not from the San Francisco BDSM club where he was having a perfectly good time. But rescued he was—by a hellcat bent on delivering him to her people. As Royce starts to trust Shani, he begins to dream of freedom. But freedom comes with a price. Royce must face his vanity, his makers, and even the loss of his sexual upgrades if he’s going to be the man Shani deserves.
Thanks as always to Goddess Fish Promotions